Last night I checked out the new high-falutin' grocery store in town. I'd been jonesing for stuffed mushrooms and I figured it was as good a place as any to find the fixings.
As I walked in the door I noticed the sign on the glass that said the usual like "no shoes, no shirt, no entry", but also said "no photography." And I was confused by that for all of five seconds until I really focused on the beauty that is the produce section.
All the strawberries were posed in little wooden picnic baskets with their hineys all pointed up. I thought, wow that must really suck to be the guy who has to pose all those strawberries and then I walked past a guy who was, at that moment, posing more strawberries in little wooden picnic baskets with their hineys all pointed up and I almost asked him if it sucked but I suspected he might just respond with a story about how it was his life's dream to pose strawberry hineys so I didn't.
The true beauty was in this six foot wall of produce. At first glance it looked to be only maybe four or five inches deep which made the beets look like they were all stacked one on top of another in a method that defied gravity or would make for really cool bowling plus cleanup on aisle nine and I was really, really impressed until I realized that the beets all had long leafy tops and that the shelves were actually about two feet deep and I kind of felt cheated. But then I looked around some more and it was all perfectly stacked. And not just in normal ways. Like the fennel alternated, fennel butt and then fennel top, for about 15 across and eight high. There were designs in the stacking and coloration. On top of it all, everything was almost the same size, shape and color amongst its various produce species. Out of the 100 employees reputed to be working at this store, obviously about half of those work in the produce department.
They also have a lot of produce you don't normally see or perhaps have never seen. Like for example, they had cauliflower in four different colors. Besides the usual plain white, they had heads of cauliflower in lime green, orange, and lavender. And I was instantly enchanted and tempted to buy said cauliflower in every color even though I never really eat it, because clearly it's not I don't like the taste but because it hasn't been festive enough.
Next time I think I'll sneak a picture.