Huh? What? Snork? Oh.

Some of you may have noticed that I have no idea what day it is.

I say "may" because nobody has commented on yesterday's post.  Hint, hint.  Which technically should be today's post.  So maybe you're going to comment today, is that it?

Comment whore alert!!

Seriously though, I've been a day off all damn week.  I think even on Monday I thought it was Tuesday.  I'll readily admit to being confused as to what year we're in -- this has to do with my job where I'm often working on a different year's assessments, to the point where I often have to ask myself "Are we in 2013 yet?"  And I also tend to lose track of the date, which is why I have calendars everywhere and a watch that tells me the date and time.  It even tells me the day of the week, which I do need occasionally because damn it, some days it just feels like a Friday.  But my delusions typically do not last this long.  Thursday, Thursday, Thursday, Thursday. 

There, all better now.

I have discovered a new addiction:  Subscription boxes.  Are you familiar with these things?  You pay a monthly fee and people send you various things in a box.  There's themes and everything.  Beauty, babies, food, pets, fitness.  It's the last one that's got me. 

I used to subscribe to KlutchClub, which is a health and fitness box.  I liked it okay, but with the exception of the Yurbuds which made it all worth it, most of the stuff didn't really blow up my skirt.  A lot of it was vegan and gluten-free which, great!  but that tended to translate into "vegan and gluten-free and chock full o' chemicals as a result."  I prefer actual food, thankyouverymuch. 

Today I decided to go looking for subscription boxes.  I knew about Kona Kase from my friend Kim, but wondered what else was out there.  Plenty, as I mentioned above.  I narrowed it down to four:  Kona Kase, Bulu Box, StrideBox, and Runnerbox.  (I could link all of those but it's not like I'd get paid for it and you all know how to Google so knock yourselves out.)  I decided to go with StrideBox and the Bulu Box weight-loss edition, the latter of which I'm thinking I'll end up doing for a couple of months and then cancel as I'm wary of weight loss supplements but am still curious about what they offer. 

I had just finished subscribing to those two, thinking I'd see what they had to offer and then maybe sign up with Kona Kase later, when I'm reading Kim's blog mere minutes later and she's there pushing Kona Kase.  A  Kona Kase Krack Kusher!  (no, that's not getting old)  Long story short, I harrassed thanked Kim for the Kona Kase discount kode and signed up for yet another box.  I had thought I might as well go sign up for the Runnerbox too, but turns out that they charge for shipping -- none of these others do -- so they're not getting my business.  At least not for now. 

I should be getting all kinds of goodies in June.  Hopefully I will like and use them all.  If not, I'm thinking us local runners should get together and have a swap party of whatever we don't like out of boxes.  And all that sounds way dirtier than I ever would've thought. 

There should also be tequila.

Cheers,
the CilleyGirl

Thirteen Things Thursday

1.  Y'all are just lucky I don't think Thirty Things Thursday is a good idea!

2.  Thanks for all the recent comments!  Amazing how once you stop posting about how crappy you feel all the time, etc., that people are interested to read the stuff that's not about that :)

3.  Speaking of crappy...  I continue to crawl out of the hole I had found myself in.  One of the insidious things about depression is you just don't realize you're in it until you're IN IT.  And often not until you're coming out the other side.  Depression is much better, mostly just a whisper.  Sinuses are good, asthma is under control.  And I finally made an appointment to see a new chiropractor, who hopefully will snap, crackle, and pop me out of this weeks-long headache I've had.  Something feels not quite right at the very base of my skull where the spiny things start.  Plus there's the source of the gigantic knots that my cute massage guy Kyle always finds in my shoulders.   And my low back.  Didn't I say I was feeling better?  I really am, I swear!

4.  Once this pesky persistent headache goes away, it will give me the oomph I need to cut back on my soda habit.  I haven't been horrible, almost always only two a day, but I'm drinking Diet Coke again and that doesn't do good things to my system.  If I can get back to just Pepsi Throwback -- minimal chemicals and real sugar, not HFCS -- then I only seem to want one a day, if that.  I think it's the real sugar that maybe makes it more satisfying?  I don't know.  But it's much easier to drink a case of Diet Coke than even two or three Pepsi Throwbacks.  Not that I want to drink a case... last time I did that there was a fifth of Captain Morgan's Spiced Rum and the Muppet Christmas Carol involved and I woke up at 3:00 a.m. drunk and wired.

5.  Some of the headache could also be from grains.  I've slowly been consuming more and more over the past two months -- ever since I got so sick back in March.  Today my tummy is pointing out just why I don't eat a lot of that stuff typically.  Just this week I've had pasta salad, tortellini with scallops, bacon and mushrooms, burgers, and bagels.  Ugh.

6.  My grandfather isn't doing so well -- early onset Alzheimer's, starting definitely to set in where it's just a matter of time before he will have to go into care -- so I'll be making a high-speed run to Idaho in a few weeks.  I'll have to text Kim to see if she'll be at the airport on those days; we have a tequila bar to check out!

7.  And.... I've completely lost all my motivation for today.  Good thing I'm leaving early for the chiropractor's!

8.  Yep, still no motivation.

9.  I'm having this urge to run a marathon.  Which is good, because I'm running one in five months and two weeks.

10.  The fun thing about going to visit my grandparents is that it's chock full of the Standard American Diet.  Cereal for breakfast.  Toast too if you're lucky.  Sandwich for lunch?  Sure!  And don't forget buttered white Wonder bread with dinner, it really makes the meal.  I tend not to eat much at Grandma's.  Even before I learned that grains were the devil, I was never really a cereal person.  Always a bacon and eggs person.  And I like a good deli sandwich -- I love a great deli sandwich -- but not so much with the sandwiches at home or for school lunch.  It could have something to do with the sandwich-making materials we had at home:  mayo, white Wonder bread, plastic orange cheese, plastic lunch meat.  When I discovered fresh sliced rare roast beef at the deli counter?  Love at first sniff!

11.  That's not to say that Grandma has a horrible diet, just a typical American food pyramid diet.  There's a meat, there's always veggies.  Always leftover veggies too; my grandparents were both born shortly after 1930 and have that Great Depression mentality about waste.  I expect we'll have a frozen pizza or lasagna one night, probably rotisserie chicken the next.  My dad will probably want me to take him big grocery shopping at WalMart, and we'll pick up Burger King on the way back.  I think Grandpa is too sick to go for Chinese food like they (and I too) like to do when I visit.  His Alzheimer's has progressed slowly, it's been at least five years since he was diagnosed but it still seems too soon.  He hasn't had problems remembering people all that much so far, just the mechanics of life, like how to work the microwave or trying to change the channel on the TV with the telephone and vice versa.  I hate this disease.  He's only just 82.

12.  Have I mentioned how happy I am to be going to the chiropractor today?  I think my back knows I'm going because it's busting out all the aches and pains as the day goes on.

13.  In the next few days my coworker and I are starting a 30 day ab challenge.  We're going to do the ab work here in the office.  We may be a while each day.

Cheers,
the CilleyGirl

Things You Learn When Adding to Your Blogroll

I've been looking for new blogs to follow and as I search I'm learning a few things.  Such as:

1.  Everybody has a cute name.  I have yet to see a weight loss or fitness blogger named Ethel or Herman.  I think there may be an unexplored niche here...

2.  I really do not like blogs that are recipe after recipe filled with food porn pictures that aren't also food blogs.  On a weight loss journey and you want to share a recipe you like?  Post a picture, okay maybe two, and then the recipe.  We're just fine without more.  Photos of salt pouring midstream are boring.  And really, other than a commercial food blogger, who has time to do those kinds of posts?  Plus all the food porn makes us hungry.  I'm looking for inspiration, not an appetite stimulant!

3.  As I've mentioned, I do not like the uberly commercial blogs where everything or every other thing is a giveaway.  To me, they lose their authenticity, their voice.  It's hard to have a connection with the blogger when it seems they're telling you a story, only to have it segue into product placement.  "And speaking of nasty toenail fungus that my brother's cousin's uncle once had, Fungaway is a fabulous product!"  Giveaways are great, but don't become one big advertisement.

4.  I do like bloggers who understand that this is all one day at a time for most of us.  Maybe even one second at a time, if we're being honest.  People losing weight who just one day that switch flips for them and they never slip up, ever?  There is one well-known blogger who took charge of himself one day, but apparently never had a setback.  In a year.  Really?  I have loads of admiration for him, but he never quite rang true for me.  This shit is HARD.  Everybody is going to slip up, at least once.  The trick to being successful -- I suspect -- is to pick yourself back up and start all over again. 

5.  Sorry to those who have their blogs laid out this way, but I hate hate hate the ones where there is the post headline with a little blurb then beneath it two columns of headlines with little blurbs.  Why are you making me click?  Why must you hide behind the blurbs?  Why can I not type "blurb" correctly the first time around?

6.  I do like bloggers who are big, as in size.  I can relate.  While I truly admire those who have successfully completed their weight loss journeys, too many of those also morph into the commercial route and, again, lose their authentic voice.  But I found myself searching the 'net, saying "Where are the hefty girls?"  (and boys, I'm not discriminating)   These are the people who inspire me.  If you start a weight loss blog because you have to lose those stubborn 15 pounds, fuck you.  I will kill and eat you.

7.  There are way too many puns about weight loss and healthy living, and they are all somebody's blog title somewhere.  Some are extremely clever and some are.... repetitive. 

After all this, I did find a few great new blogs to read.  I really need some inspiration.  The depression is better though, for which I am very thankful.  Slept about twelve hours or so Friday night but was up later Saturday night and up earlier Sunday morning, got about a "normal" eight hours or so, and I even had the energy to cook and reorganize my garage.  It's been a LONG time since I've felt like that much activity.

We had our first week weigh-in for my office's Biggest Loser challenge.  There are four of us:  one is out of town, the other two gals lost weight, and I . . . gained 1.8 lbs.  I knew it was coming.  Not that I've been eating horrible or anything, in fact I ate rather lightly all weekend although more carbs than I usually have.  But I feel compelled to point out that (a) we're doing our weigh-ins fully clothed, including shoes; (b) I was wearing way heavier clothes today than from a week ago, given that it's about 20 degrees cooler here today; and (c) I start my period this week.  Normally my "official" weight that I do at home is stark nekkid and as empty as I can be.  Oh well.  Next week I'll be back down!

Cheers,
the CilleyGirl

Thirteen Things Thursday

1.  A brief rant here:  What in the hell makes men think they can treat women like that?  Kidnap your own personal sex slave?  It's beyond wrong, it should be inconceivable -- but apparently not.  And shit like elected officials talking about "legitimate" rape and thinking they have the right to legislate what we do with our own bodies that forms the foundation for evil men like Ariel Castro.  There is a story going on right now in this area about comments a Willamette University frat posted in a  Facebook group.  Other college campuses where reports of rape and sexual assault are deliberately suppressed.  The military.  Stand up for your rights, ladies.  We cannot allow ourselves to be treated like second class citizens -- or worse. 

2.  Girl kitty discovered last night the joy of licking the spout on the Keurig coffee maker.  She is obsessed with this Cafe Caramel coffee I have.  She stole a full K-cup and did her best to eat it.  She will stick her head into my mug if I'm not watching for her.  Now she can get it straight from the source.  Note to self:  Clean coffee maker!

3.  In my Monday post describing my snot situation, I forgot the most important news:  I started a Biggest Loser challenge at the office.  I read about how one blogger's office was doing it and thought it sounded like great motivation -- because it involves money.  How we are doing it is every one participating puts in $20.  We weigh in weekly for ten weeks.  If you gain weight in a week, you put another $1 in the pot.  If you lose weight, nothing.  Person with the greatest percentage of weight loss at the end wins the pot.  And probably buys everybody donuts. 

4.  Slightly bummed (but not surprised) by my starting weight, and then yesterday my clothes were just so snug.  I was grumpy.  Today I realized that Aunt Flo comes to town soon.  So now not so grumpy.  And eating a big cinnamon roll.  Somehow those two things are related, I swear.

5.  Started and finished the new Sookie Stackhouse book last night, which is the final book in the series.  I've read that a lot of people are unhappy with the ending -- won't spoil it for you -- but I think it's the only way it could have ended.  At least an ending that made Sookie happy.  There is another book coming out this fall that is supposed to tell what happened to every one (still living and/or not undead) in the Sookieverse.  I'm looking forward to that. 

6.  My all-time favorite series is Donna Andrews' Meg Langslow series.  I have to admit that if Ms. Andrews ever decides to bring Meg's story to a close we may be looking at Misery - The Sequel.  Seriously though, if you want a well-written, well-plotted mystery, go read her Murder With Peacocks.

7.  On my bucket list is to take a cruise, although I keep reading things that make me think maybe it's not such a good idea.  I am bolstered though by the fact that all of these cruise-ship incidents seem to take place over there  ----> and not in say the cruises to Alaska. 

8.  Did I mention earlier that I made clam chowder last weekend?  It was a lot easier than I thought it would be, and it turned out great.  Not low-cal by any means, but great.  Really good with cheesy garlic toast too.  Which I shouldn't be having.

9.  Sharks.  shudder

10.  Anyone have any good weight loss blogs they want to give a shout out to?  I culled out my reader list the other day, taking out people who haven't updated in months, and now I'm short on motivational stories.  I don't like the overly commercial ones, I prefer peeps like me who are currently overweight but unlike me are actually losing and running and stuff.  Leave me your faves in the comments.

11.  By the way, I didn't eat all of that cinnamon roll.  It was huge and extremely sweet.  I may have the rest tomorrow, else into the trash it goes. 

12.  Allie Brosh is back!  If you've never read her blog, Hyperbole and a Half, it is fabulous.  Go read it now.  Really.  I'll wait.  Are you back?  Isn't it fabulous?  Her post on depression -- I lived that.  For years.  Had a whole year of feeling nothing followed by several years of hating everything interspersed with the desire to do nothing because what is the point?  I'm living with the latter to a lesser degree right now.  It started just before Vegas and is still in full swing.  I would say I hate depression but it seems like too much effort.  I'm spending some time with good friends this weekend and I hope that tips me back the other way, into the land of normal people.

13.  A new tequila bar just opened up at the Portland Airport.  They say it is the largest tequila bar in any U.S. airport.  I'm feeling the need to take a trip...

Cheers,
the CilleyGirl

Monday Musings

I used that title because I can't do another post with "I'm alive!" as the header.  Even though I am.  Alive that is.

Lots going on and it's all trying to kill me, these extracurricular activities.  I've downloaded all my wedding/reception photos but haven't launched them into the Cloud yet so none to post here.  Or to send to the bride.  Eventually I will.  Right now it's too hot to use a laptop.  Makes your lap all sweaty and stuff.

I'm back on a massive dose of antibiotics as well as a daily double dose of nasal steroid spray.  Because why swallow your steroids when you can just snort them directly into your bloodstream?  And yes, injecting your steroids would also go directly into your bloodstream but these aren't those kind of steroids.  These are supposed to make your sinuses smaller.  Not your muscles bigger.  Although I guess those kind of steroids also make your balls shrink so maybe I don't fully understand the whole steroid thing.  Luckily I do not have actual balls, merely metaphysical ones. 

And they're HUGE.

Anyhow.  Sinuses better but me not so much.  Damn antibiotics make me tired as anything.  Plus I may be having a depressive thing.  I took an extra happy pill today to see if that helped.  Eh, maybe 50-50.  Right now I think the heat is sucking any of the energy I have left after taking the antibiotics.  Yes Kim, I am bitching about the heat already.  Some of us don't have air conditioning in our houses so neener.  And, invite me over ;)

Rock 'n Roll Half is in what, two weeks?  Hahahahahahahahahaha.  Yes, I am still doing it.  Should be fun!  Booked my MCM hotel last week, scored a decent deal at $129 a night.  Thinking about booking it for the whole week -- that was their regular rate and it comes with a kitchenette -- just in case my friend's couch ends up not being available.  Now I just have to start training again...

Cheers,
the CilleyGirl

Normally I'd say I'm still alive but it's a little iffy at the moment...

My last post here was April 2 where I had just missed out on the Hop Hop Half and was mostly over the plague I caught right after Shamrock.  I was finally getting back into the swing of things and looking forward to the Fruit Fly's April 14 Vegas wedding where I was to be a bridesmaid.  Had only a touch of a cough when I boarded the plane on Friday for Vegas....

... and promptly got knocked on my ass by first a massive allergy attack brought on by the dry air/smoke/whatever the hell those scents are they pump into the casinos and then by a series of asthma attacks.  Yes, seems I have developed full blown asthma. 

Remember how at Shamrock I had an asthma attack during the race?  About a year or so after I started running I was diagnosed with exercise-induced asthma.  It's pretty much just what it sounds like, physical activity triggers asthma.  It tends to be particularly triggered by exercise during cold weather.  I've had an inhaler since I was diagnosed and if it were cold out I would take a hit or two prior to running and be fine.  A few months ago my allergist suggested I add Singulair in there as well, which is an asthma med in a pill form that works not to immediately treat the symptoms of an asthma attack but rather help prevent them from happening in the first place.  It's often used when the sufferer also has allergies; I was prescribed Singulair after my last scratch test. 

Also remember how when I got sick last month I was coughing so hard I would vomit?  And also how I said the cough suppressant meds stopped working on day two of being sick?  Apparently that's a sign it's not really a cough cough, but asthma.  While in Vegas, hacking up my lungs and -- bonus!! -- constantly wetting my pants, not like a little leakage but like I might as well have been on the toilet peeing, I came across this article -- I have everything she talks about in there.  Until I read that I had been thinking that my cough was merely a result of post-nasal drip as a consequence of allergies.  Of course I hadn't brought my asthma inhaler with me to Vegas because I hadn't been planning on running.  Dancing down the aisle, yes; running, no.  It also wasn't going to be anything resembling cold in Vegas either.

So, long story short:  The wedding was absolutely beautiful and a lot of fun.  We danced down the aisle to our places.  The minister said some amazing things.  I started to cough in the middle of it all; thankfully the bride was too busy to notice!  (And the mother of the bride knew that I was worried about coughing during the ceremony and told me that if I had to cough to just let it rip -- I love her!!)  And two of the people I care about most in the world are now married. 

Unfortunately, outside of the actual wedding I had a pretty miserable time of it in Vegas because of the whole coughing and peeing thing.  I finally had to buy some major maxi pads so that I could quit washing out my clothes every evening.  I went through so many cough drops -- which didn't really work, because ASTHMA -- I burnt my tongue and couldn't taste my food.  I went to see Cirque du Soleil's KA and had three massive coughing fits and probably peed through to the seat.  I went back to my hotel room to change into post-wedding festivity clothes and had coughing fits where I couldn't manage to draw in the breath to cough (which is incredibly scary when you're all by yourself in another city, I almost decided to go to the ER) so I couldn't celebrate with my friends.  I've promised RR that I will dance my ass off at the wedding reception next weekend to make up for it. 

I should add that of course there were some fabulous memories despite my lungs.  I learned how to lap dance (hello kitty!) and pole dance.  I learned you shouldn't do either of those barefoot or you will get a gigantic blister on your pinky toe.  I had an amazing lobster dinner while I people-watched in the Caesar's Forum Shops.  Our dance down the aisle, which unbeknownst to anyone I had choreographed my little part complete with props.  The ceremony -- if I ever get married, I totally want that minister.  RR's dress was gorgeous and she was gorgeous in it.  My view of the strip from my hotel room.  KA. 

I checked out of my hotel room on Monday right around noon.  I had about two hours to kill before my airport shuttle so I found a nice comfy chair outside a little food court area where I could read a book and watch TV.  I checked my facebook feed and started seeing people asking about Boston, then the report broke into ESPN on the TV about the bombing.  Unbelievable.  My heart goes out to those involved.  I can just imagine how massive security will now be at MCM this October.  I'm too sick to run for Boston today with everyone else, but I'm with them in spirit.

I'll get some Vegas pics up in the next few days.  I go to the doctor tomorrow to beg for something like Cipro.  Did I mention I have a major sinus infection underneath all of this?

Cheers,
the CilleyGirl

When last we left our heroine...

... she had just run the clusterfuck that was the 2013 Shamrock Run.  Yay!

I got word yesterday that medals are in the mail, hopefully mine will be here today.  They're changing up a few things next year that hopefully will make things run more smoothly.  Because I will be running the 2014 Shamrock.  If you run and you live in Portland, you almost have to do it.   C'mon RR, you know you'll be doing it too!

Anyhow, I pulled 15K out of my ass and was feeling a lot better post-race than I probably deserved.  Race was Sunday, Monday I felt like I'd ran 9.3 miles but nothing unusual except a twinge in my right Achilles that had me worried for that weekend's Hop Hop Half.  By Tuesday though the twinge was nearly gone which would have been fabulous if I hadn't woken up with the fucking plague.

Yep, I caught that particularly nasty crud that has been going around for months.  And that shit lingers.  I dragged myself through work that Tuesday but was out Wednesday and Thursday wishing I were dead.  Friday I had to come in and the ten hour day I put in triggered a relapse.  No Hop Hop Half for me :(  Seriously seriously seriously fucking BUMMED to miss that race.  Well, to miss the medal.  I did get to fondle RR's medal and nearly pulled her into my lap to bring it closer.  My precious!  RR, please leave that medal to me in your will upon your death, pretty please with tots on top?

Anyhow.  Spent the weekend being a lump on the couch and missing Hop Hop.  Monday I bailed on work again because did I mention this shit lingers?  Had to be back in on Tuesday and long story short (too late!) it wasn't until Friday that I was finally feeling better.  Summer briefly visited Portlandia this past weekend with temps in the low 70s; I spent my weekend as a slightly more animated lump on the couch with many less interludes of unconsciousness or of wetting my pants/throwing up because I was coughing so hard.  Now I'm mostly better but there's POLLEN everywhere.  But I will be running again soon.   Rock 'n Roll Half is just not all that far away.

Hope everyone is doing well and plague-free!

Cheers,
the CilleyGirl